USA! USA! We’re Number 1!!
1 Like
What do you think is going on? You know. Republicans don’t want any regulation and are perfectly fine with this shit happening in Pigfuckerville. They absolutely do not care. If I thought this sort of thing might change the minds of the voters in places like East Palestine, OH, I might care more, too. But those motherfuckers voted for Trump by better than 70% so they got exactly what they were asking for although they’re too stupid to know that’s what they were asking for, they thought it was just I can be mean to brown people again and queers too if I’m a mind to woohoo.
It’s the fraternal twin of gun violence.
2 Likes
I’m not so sure. Both countries appear to maintain a healthy surplus.
1 Like
I feel compelled to share this again.
This will never not be funny to me.
Well, I mean, except when you reflect for a moment it’s not really all that funny at all.
I might have to listen again to remember which town he singles out to make fun of. I was wondering about that just the other day. South Cunthorpe or West Wiggerstick or some shit like that where they voted leave by 80% and by god no Belgian fuck is going to dictate the contents of MY brown sauce.
1 Like
Burnham-on-Crouch. Outstanding community. Almost as nice as Milton Fiddle.
1 Like
The Bank of England recently announced that they figure British families are ￡1,000 a year worse off, purely because of Brexit.
As usual, truth is stranger than fiction:
According to the Domesday Book of 1086, Burnham was held in 1066 by a thegn called Alward and 10 free men. After 1066 it was acquired by a Norman called Tedric Pointel of Coggeshall whose overlord was Ralph Baynard.
Driving through England is like taking a tour of Middle Earth.
What would it look like if you translated this into English?
1 Like
That’s a lotta brown sauce, matey.
Or a lot of trips to Calais to buy your duty free alcohol and tobacco and of course since you’re entering the EU it now requires an immigration procedure and from what I’ve read it involves extremely long queueueueueues hey you can’t spell queue without EU.
2 Likes
Brits love standing in line. Queuing is up there with dry bacon sandwiches in the god tier.
For the record, we enjoy standing in line as much as anyone else. The thing that is different is that the line must be neat and orderly.
Does that make the line move faster?
Nope. But an orderly line means that it’s easy to spot someone trying to cut in, which remains the only capital crime on the books. If convicted, the heathen is strung up on the wall of the Thames outside the Prospect of Whitby, and then we wait for the tide to come in.
Spoiler
We actually used to do this.
Neat and orderly and there sure as shit better be a bacon sarnie waiting for me at the end of it.
2 Likes
I actually spend an unusual amount of times on vesselfinder these days!
1 Like
Airport gate procedures are the most triggering for me. The typical nonsense is that people gather near the gate even though they’re in row eleventy, so they don’t move when a new set of rows is called but you don’t know if that’s because it’s not their turn or because it is their turn but they’re waiting for the people in front of them to move. This puts a Brit on the horns of the horrific dilemma of either trying to squeeze past and risk getting crushed by embarrassment when that person is also trying to board, or face the prospect of having to talk to a stranger.
The two extremes I’ve experienced are in Mexico City (where I was usually upgraded to first class on my return flight to Houston), where all those in the know would hang back and wait for two rookies to take their opportunity to board first, only to get pulled aside immediately for additional scrutiny. They always took the first two, so the instant two people walk up to the gate, everyone else piles into a line behind them.
The other extreme was in São Paulo, where the process involves someone shouting “GO!” in Portuguese and then all hell breaking loose.
Last summer batgirl and I took a Thames cruise from Westminster to Greenwich, and she remarked that pretty much every landmark pointed out by the “tour guide” was either a really old pub or a place where the government would kill its subjects for insufficient loyalty (which presumably includes queueing). Centuries of it.
1 Like
A pint and an execution, the breakfast of champions.
1 Like
Back in the middle of the 18th century just prior to an execution the viewing platform collapsed and killed nearly 20 spectators. I suspect pints were involved one way or the other.
A certain Lord Lovat witnessed the events and remarked, ‘The greater mischief, the better sport.’ I like a chap who puts a nice slant on things, always walk on the sunny side, what.
Anyway, the execution was Lord Lovat’s own.
3 Likes