Astros @ Mariners, August 31, 2021

Hoping to make it three innings.

I’ve got a buddy at the game doing his part.

Pulling for the team?

Of course.

I wouldn’t be friends with a fan of the Fishmongers.

Astros take multiple fat pitches right down the middle in order to flail at slop. Go quickly and quietly in the first.

I fucking hate the MarONRs. I’m glad they moved us to the American League, so we could beat the shit out of those grog-gargling, sea-slime-colored wearers of whale penises. I hope the Astros put an anchor up their collective ass.


I’ll never understand Correa’s “approach” of working his way into a 3-1 count, in hopes of getting a center-cut fastball, and then having absolutely no intention of swinging at a 3-1 center-cut fastball.

Crawford smacks a 3-1 center-cut fastball. Huh. Imagine that. Crazy approach.

Sample size too small to draw a conclusion.

McCullers really struggling with command.

We need to avast these swabs.

Shiver their timbers. Ok, maybe not that.

We need to send these barnacle encrusted scurvy bucket gobs to dry dock.

Hard tack them to the mast.

ETA: and not load the bases with a walk.

Back to back 2-out walks loads the bases for the Mariners

Lance, get yer shit together.

Lance is getting close to being keelhauled.

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McCullers really labors through the first…leaves the bases loaded, but no runs. No score.

Ok Stros, go straight at 'em. . .

Astro blast the seamen.

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