Today’s lineup is brought to you by Fuckitall. When you’re out of ideas on how to beat the worst team in baseball, just call Fuckitall and we’ll come prepare a random lineup for you, complete with multiple off days!
Diaz at 3B and hitting fourth has to be an upgrade, right?
He’s been on a tear, so who knows? Fuckitall
Diaz hit a line drive with two on but right at the guy making his first ever major league start at first base.
I think Yuli would tell you he should make that play.
Ok, it’s time for Jake to stop sucking.
Javier hangs it, Vogt bangs it.
Piscotty hits the next pitch out.
Motherbuttfucker! God dammit!
Only the 2022 Stros could give up BtB bombs to the 2022 As.
Are the Astros are the shittiest team ever with a 64 win and 34 loss record?
This ballclub could easily be 70 and 28 if they didn’t sometimes play like shit.
Lee overmatched again, Altuve with a line drive bunt, and Yuli a harmless fly ball.
They have a dangerously annoying ability to not show up when the stakes are lukewarm.
I’m going back to soccer. That may give the good guys a chance.
Javier gets a 1-2-3 in the third, but still trails 2-0.
The chickens are frying, not much else I can do to help the team.
4-3, fly out, fly out from the heart of this Astros lineup. Complete limp bats.
If I ever come across that guy on his phone in the “it’s a lovely day today” commercial, I will go out of my way to run over him.