Yankees @ Astros Game 1, July 21, 2022

Javier toes the rubber for the Good Guys.

And is doing a great job of sucking hind tit so far.

5 pitch walk
Rizzo fly out to left
Plunks Judge on 0-2

Javier with a little command issues.

and now down 2-0 to Carpenter.

Get it together, fucko.

Battled back to a full count then got a F8.

2 outs, Torres up.

T1:

LeMahieu draws a leadoff walk
Rizzo flies to shallow LF
Judge…0-2…hit by pitch
Carpenter…full count…flies out F8
Torres flies out F9 in foul territory as Tucker falls into the netting

Javier works around a little traffic…no score

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Tucker makes a spectacular lunging catch at net down the right field fence in foul ground!

I yield to the gentleman sitting with his hat next to him.

I’m fixin to go sit outside and smoke a cigar…so I’ll put my hat back on.

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Okay, this is hilarious.

Sweeeeet!

What an absolutely shit at-bat by Tucker.

What the fuck, Tuck?!?!?

Fucking Christ, Diaz.

Another horrible at-bat.

It appears the Astros could use that Alvarez guy on the bench.

B1:

Altuve with a nice bunt up the 1B line for a single…breaks up the perfect game with a bunt will be the Yankee headline
Peña bunts down the 3B line for a base hit, Altuve to 2B
Tucker hacking…quickly down 0-2…strikes out swinging…frankly looked pretty silly that at bat
Bregman singles to CF, Altuve scores, Peña to 3B
Diaz strikes out swinging
Gurriel flies out F7

Astros leave a pair, but lead 1-0

THROW FUCKING STRIKES YOU FUCKING GOON.

Jesus, they can’t catch up to your fastball, and you nibble your way into fucking walks.

Keuchel DFA by Dbacks

T2:

Hicks…full count…draws another leadoff walk
Treviño…0-2…1-2…2-2…foul…soft broken bat liner to SS
Marwin…0-2…1-2 on a wild pitch allowing Hicks to move to 2B and take the double play out of order…strikes out swinging
Gallo pops out F6

1-0 Astros

If you’re outside this summer, do you have to light the cigar to smoke it?

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