Astros at Indians, July 1, 2021

The odds of Altuve swinging at something awful here are almost 100 percent, right?

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Magic 8-ball says “Yes”

Odds of him taking two fat pitches…also “yes”

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And here it comes.

El Salami Grande!!!

I’ll take that.

Fuck you, Magic 8-ball

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ATTABABY YOU RIDICULOUS MIDGET!

WAKE UP EVERYONE! THE OFFENSE IS BACK!

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That was a serious backup cement mixer.

Thank you Mark.

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YES!!! Smiles in the dugout again!!!

I’ll see myself out.

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Yay, Jose! Maybe that will get us going again.

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Toro with a sharp single up the middle

Jesus, Esch. Quit laughing at your own jokes.

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And that’ll do it for Mejia.

I muted after Altuve’s first AB.

I regret nothing!

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Elton John is having another farewell tour?

I had tickets for EJ from last July. It’s been rescheduled for January, I think.

Brantley with a 2-bagger! Toro to 3B